I hate my apartment.

So there's a game I play. I play it whenever I boil water, heat up a pan, use the stove, or look at the stove.

Best case scenario, I hear the tiny, disconnected fire alarm go off.

For there is STEAM! And some fucking idiot put a fire alarm by the natural flow out for steam from the stove. So we've unplugged it for sanity. Some steam might get in the bedroom by magic or by me forgetting to shut the door. (Yes, cannot cook with an open bedroom door. For steam means fire. Or spaghetti. They just want to be thorough.

Second scenario, there's something in the burner. It may or may not be imaginary. This will still create smoke, even if there's nothing visibly there and it's all been cleaned. Residue from water, oxygen, nitrogen, or carbon in any of its forms can do this. 100% chance of this smoke permeating the door and causing the working fire alarm to blare loudly. Can't cook when anyone's sleeping or... well... it's right over the bed. The little one beeps still, to let us know food's cooking.


Third scenario, this creates fire. This can be from imaginary things too. Often creates heat spikes which can cause over boiling and actual spills... which create stench and fire. Fire is not good for kitchens and makes really irritating fire alarms go into overdrive, I think. They KNOW.


I... hate my apartment. It has a sense of humor. I have a lease that ends in July.